Declaration
by PresidentLauraRoslinAdama
Summary: Set before the books. Marissa Coulter writes letters to the love of her life and her baby girl to try and explain her actions


Title: Declaration of Love

Fandom: His Dark Materials

Pairing: Coulter/AsrielSpoilers: The Northern Lights and the film versionSummary: Letter from Marisa to Lord Asriel

Word Count: 764

A/N Written after a nights drinking at 3 in the morning. Is very OOC on the part of Marisa but I was feeling angst and in a kind of mushy romantic mood

Disclaimer: I very clearly don't own the His Dark Materials series, I am but a mere broke college student.

My dearest Asriel,

I love you of course I do its just that I can't go on this way I just can't do it take her please put her somewhere safe were she can be protected from the differences in both of her worlds somewhere where she will be protected by your knowledge and our love I need for you to protect our daughter the only physical representation I have of the time when I was the happiest I have ever been and fear now will be ever again. She is both of ours; half of the you and half of me and I pray that she has inherited your intellect and mine, your cunning and mine. In short I hope she will go on to posses all of our good qualities and mine. I know that in our own ways we will go on to protect for as long as we possibly and will be there for her if ever she should need us but I feel that Lyra , our little baby girl will go on to amazing things if not with our direct guidance then with as much help as we are able to give her. She cannot stay at the convent as much as I love and respect the church I want her with people we can both trust. That is why I am making this request that you take her to Jordan College where she will be taken care of.

Be safe my Love and protect our little girl because she is the best of us. She is the love we have for each other. I still hope that one day I will be able to stand beside you and be pronounced Lady Asriel Belaqua even if it is only a dream, it is my dream and I will treasure it everyday until we meet again

Forever yours,

Marisa x

P.s I have also sent a letter that I would like you to give Lyra when you feel she is old enough to know the truth about whom her parents truly are and I hope that you would keep this letter too and show her that the reason we cannot keep her is not that we don't love her but that we love her so much that we know no matter how much this might hurt it is for the best.

To my darling daughter,

I don't know how much time will have elapsed between the writing of this letter and your reading it but I do hope that we have met and that you know the true nature of our relationship. It might not seem like it just now but your father and I did what we felt was right under the circumstances. As I write this you are but three months old and the most beautiful little girl I have ever laid eyes upon. Your father and I love you dearly, we have since the day we found out I was expecting you. In the current circumstances there is no way that we could have kept you with us and still kept you safe. Even if as you read this you hate me for abandoning you I want you to know that I have thought of you everyday since you were born and will continue to o so everyday until I die. Lyra, I love you and your father more than life itself. All we have ever wanted is for you to be safe, happy and protected. I know that whatever happens you will do great things with your life because you are amazing my little girl.

All my love always,

Mum x

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Marisa Coulters eyes filled with tears as she passed the letter to Asriel's solicitor, the only person with whom she would leave such a private message. "Please tell him that these are my wishes but I understand if he does not feel that they are for the best then he does not need to carry them out" she quietly instructed the man "Yes ma'am" he replied "Lord Asriel asked me give you a message". Marisa held her breath hoping that nothing was wrong. "He wanted me to tell you that he will look after the baby to the best of his abilities from so far away and that no matter what no matter the consequences he still believes part of your destiny is to one day become Lady Marisa Belaqua" Marisa turned from the man as the tears fell "Tell him" she said in a ragged whisper "that I believe that to".

Finished


End file.
